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Shut it
Shut it
Regular price
$19.99 USD
Regular price
Sale price
$19.99 USD
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Congratulations, you’ve found the perfect garment for anyone whose patience is thinner than their hairline and whose inside voice took a one-way trip to the graveyard. Slip this bad-attitude billboard over your torso and let the cotton do the conflict-avoidance for you:
Zero-subtlety, maximum peace & quiet. Your chest becomes a 100-decibel silence grenade—yank the pin by simply walking into a room.
Premium “hush” fabric. Ringspun cotton so soft it feels like a librarian’s shush—right before she tasers you.
Universal insult coverage. Works on chatty coworkers, bar-stool philosophers, mansplainers, loud FaceTimers, and that guy who narrates movie plots out loud.
Built-in profanity filter. Actually, scratch that—there is no filter. (If you need one, knit your own cardigans, grandma.)
Perfect gift. For introverts, hangover sufferers, new parents on zero sleep, or anyone whose resting heart rate spikes at the word “brainstorm.”
Warning: May cause temporary speech paralysis in bystanders—or spontaneous applause from the blessedly silent. Put it on, take a deep breath, and let the cotton whisper what you’re too tired to say: shhh… ut the f** up.*
• 100% cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester
• Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester
• Heather colors are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
• Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (170-180 g/m²)
• Open-end yarn
• Tubular fabric
• Taped neck and shoulders
• Double seam at sleeves and bottom hem
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Zero-subtlety, maximum peace & quiet. Your chest becomes a 100-decibel silence grenade—yank the pin by simply walking into a room.
Premium “hush” fabric. Ringspun cotton so soft it feels like a librarian’s shush—right before she tasers you.
Universal insult coverage. Works on chatty coworkers, bar-stool philosophers, mansplainers, loud FaceTimers, and that guy who narrates movie plots out loud.
Built-in profanity filter. Actually, scratch that—there is no filter. (If you need one, knit your own cardigans, grandma.)
Perfect gift. For introverts, hangover sufferers, new parents on zero sleep, or anyone whose resting heart rate spikes at the word “brainstorm.”
Warning: May cause temporary speech paralysis in bystanders—or spontaneous applause from the blessedly silent. Put it on, take a deep breath, and let the cotton whisper what you’re too tired to say: shhh… ut the f** up.*
• 100% cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester
• Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester
• Heather colors are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
• Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (170-180 g/m²)
• Open-end yarn
• Tubular fabric
• Taped neck and shoulders
• Double seam at sleeves and bottom hem
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
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